The third gender
The day I began to look forward to red traffic lights, I realised that my curiosity about the eunuchs (hijras/aruvaanis) was soon turning to be an obsession.
Confident with heads held high, the eunuchs plunge into the traffic day in and out, to make their living by demanding money and at nights adorn shady highways posing as sex workers. Their weapon against the society is their existence - a unique combination of body and soul - that for years have caused dis-belief, anguish, disgust, anger, interest, curiosity and sympathy but has rarely been understood or accepted.
According to a survey done in 2002 it was estimated that there were over 1 million eunuchs in India and only 5% were eunuchs by birth. The rest of them were castrated men. Men, who at a certain age realise that have always been different; that they are a woman's spirit trapped in a man's body; that they can no longer suppress their true nature and talk, dress or behave like a man to please their friends; that their parents are ashamed of accepting them for themselves; that they can in no way think of marrying a woman and pretend to be a father to the kids; that they are homosexuals in a way and are expected to be ashamed about it; that to be happy, understood, accepted and loved for who they really are they need to be away from the society and live with someone who knows what it is to be them.
Sadly, they are still humans who have needs, who are Outcasts in a society where the 'untouchables' are treated better - the price they pay for pursuing happiness and refusing a lifetime of pretense in a society that doesn't leave room for them. After generations of having been humiliated and ill treated, it is only natural that they have turned hostile towards the society, a feeling that that would have been amplified by traumatic personal experiences. Further, having been prey to researchers and NGOs who have manipulated their situation for self benefits, the eunuchs have built dangerous, cold walls that make sure that there is no space for an outsider. There have been several incidents where young boys have been kidnapped by eunuchs and castrated mercilessly, cases where men pretend to be eunuchs to mint money, cases where they inflict themselves on the society and offend its moral sensibilities . There will be much more in the years to come.
But before pointing fingers at them, for our own good in a way, I think it is about time we gear up to face the real issue. Nobody is born a thief. Nobody is a eunuch happily by choice. If we accept them as they are, there would be no reason why they would opt for a humiliating life on the streets far away from their own families.
I dream of a day when a eunuchs are no longer made to feel a minority, can walk with grace and dignity into a beauty salon, cinema hall or ice cream parlor, appear for aptitude examinations or avail bank loans, can be skilled carpenters or practicing lawyers. I dream of a day when they have the opportunity to earn their bread without losing their pride. I dream of a day when I can befriend them and love them as I love my friends. I dream that their dreams will come true. It is definitely not a change that can happen in a year, but a decade might be achievable if the people in power set their minds.
I think the answer lies realising that they are not "Men trying to be women". They are the Third gender.
Note:
These are my personal views and not intended to offend any sentiments. If this article makes you think or nod in agreement, I am glad to hear about it. If you can propose any activity that will go towards helping their cause, I am all ears. If you think otherwise, feel free to enlighten me.
Confident with heads held high, the eunuchs plunge into the traffic day in and out, to make their living by demanding money and at nights adorn shady highways posing as sex workers. Their weapon against the society is their existence - a unique combination of body and soul - that for years have caused dis-belief, anguish, disgust, anger, interest, curiosity and sympathy but has rarely been understood or accepted.
According to a survey done in 2002 it was estimated that there were over 1 million eunuchs in India and only 5% were eunuchs by birth. The rest of them were castrated men. Men, who at a certain age realise that have always been different; that they are a woman's spirit trapped in a man's body; that they can no longer suppress their true nature and talk, dress or behave like a man to please their friends; that their parents are ashamed of accepting them for themselves; that they can in no way think of marrying a woman and pretend to be a father to the kids; that they are homosexuals in a way and are expected to be ashamed about it; that to be happy, understood, accepted and loved for who they really are they need to be away from the society and live with someone who knows what it is to be them.
Sadly, they are still humans who have needs, who are Outcasts in a society where the 'untouchables' are treated better - the price they pay for pursuing happiness and refusing a lifetime of pretense in a society that doesn't leave room for them. After generations of having been humiliated and ill treated, it is only natural that they have turned hostile towards the society, a feeling that that would have been amplified by traumatic personal experiences. Further, having been prey to researchers and NGOs who have manipulated their situation for self benefits, the eunuchs have built dangerous, cold walls that make sure that there is no space for an outsider. There have been several incidents where young boys have been kidnapped by eunuchs and castrated mercilessly, cases where men pretend to be eunuchs to mint money, cases where they inflict themselves on the society and offend its moral sensibilities . There will be much more in the years to come.
But before pointing fingers at them, for our own good in a way, I think it is about time we gear up to face the real issue. Nobody is born a thief. Nobody is a eunuch happily by choice. If we accept them as they are, there would be no reason why they would opt for a humiliating life on the streets far away from their own families.
I dream of a day when a eunuchs are no longer made to feel a minority, can walk with grace and dignity into a beauty salon, cinema hall or ice cream parlor, appear for aptitude examinations or avail bank loans, can be skilled carpenters or practicing lawyers. I dream of a day when they have the opportunity to earn their bread without losing their pride. I dream of a day when I can befriend them and love them as I love my friends. I dream that their dreams will come true. It is definitely not a change that can happen in a year, but a decade might be achievable if the people in power set their minds.
I think the answer lies realising that they are not "Men trying to be women". They are the Third gender.
Note:
These are my personal views and not intended to offend any sentiments. If this article makes you think or nod in agreement, I am glad to hear about it. If you can propose any activity that will go towards helping their cause, I am all ears. If you think otherwise, feel free to enlighten me.
